cumaddict72:

guccier:

nice url did ur mom pick it out for u

yes

oeuniverse:

In order to become the supreme adult, you must perform the seven wonders:

  • Public speaking
  • Not being afraid of teenagers
  • Calling the doctor yourself
  • Taxes
  • Arguing without crying
  • Having a normal sleep pattern
  • Having an answer to the question ‘what do you want to do with your life?’

umyehs:

fedorahatmatt:

umyehs:

breaking news: white cis boy drinks a can of monster energy drink, more at 11

breaking news: tumblr feminists continue to make jokes about cis white guys which in turn make them look exactly like the idea of man hating feminists that I thought we were trying to break away from

breaking news: I am a cis white boy and I was talking about myself, sit down child.

mosellegreen:

cumaeansibyl:

green-evening:

Sometimes in daily life I like to pretend I’m a time traveler from late medieval Europe and I’m just fucking amazed at my luxurious life

Let me tell you, 14th c me is REALLY impressed with modern me’s easy access to pepper and cinnamon

"you have multiple purple garments? you must be a person of some note"

"these chairs are fantastically luxurious"

"I’ve never seen so much salt in one place"

I am going to start playing this game.

(Source: thatgreenevening)

georgetakei:

Especially useful when your enemies paint you into a corner.

Source: Nerdgasm, a community for nerds

georgetakei:

Especially useful when your enemies paint you into a corner.

Source: Nerdgasm, a community for nerds

mountlandme:

thequeerwholived:

HOW DID THEY DRESS UP THESE GEESE WITHOUT BEING EATEN

They are ducks not geese (most of them look like runner ducks but some might be Peking ducks) . Ducks aren’t grumpy like geese. 

(Source: archiemcphee)

jacobtheloofah:

no but the best part is how he got the name:
his name was originally “potatoes,” and his owner, willoughby bertie, told the stable lad who helped him to write the horse’s name on a feed bin. the boy misheard it as, literally “pot-eight-o’s” and wrote it with 8 o’s. bertie found it so funny that he kept that as the horses name.

jacobtheloofah:

no but the best part is how he got the name:

his name was originally “potatoes,” and his owner, willoughby bertie, told the stable lad who helped him to write the horse’s name on a feed bin. the boy misheard it as, literally “pot-eight-o’s” and wrote it with 8 o’s. bertie found it so funny that he kept that as the horses name.

(Source: juanbercow)

 

laughhard:

I guess that settles that argument

 

laughhard:

I guess that settles that argument

achievement-hunter:

cnemidophoru-sex-anguis:

worlds most cynical art student

that title is a feat in itself

achievement-hunter:

cnemidophoru-sex-anguis:

worlds most cynical art student

that title is a feat in itself

rettaroo:

fiorinda-chancellor:

setbabiesonfire:

swallowedwholeinnegatives:

What does this mean?

That, my friend, is exactly the question you have to ask.

It means that this is one of the best ways to pile up rocks and not have them fall down for a long time.

#i’m not saying it was architecture #but it was architecture (via life-of-a-fanatic)

rettaroo:

fiorinda-chancellor:

setbabiesonfire:

swallowedwholeinnegatives:

What does this mean?

That, my friend, is exactly the question you have to ask.

It means that this is one of the best ways to pile up rocks and not have them fall down for a long time.

  (via life-of-a-fanatic)

(Source: zowieee)

hatetveit:

john quincy adams was the first US president to grant a personal interview to a female reporter, and the only reason he allowed it was because the reporter (anne royall) caught him skinny dipping in the potomac, sat on his clothes, and refused to let him get dressed until he answered her questions and if you dont think that’s one of the coolest stories of early US society then idk what to tell you

allisonthenerdmachine:

On a scale of 1 to the War of the Worlds broadcast how misunderstood is your joke.

(Source: sklmmons)

mishasminions:

trust-me-imma-doctor:

glitterbites:

Collecting these because no one understands their genius. They make me want to go to school. Ps please don’t change the source!

The Jesus one tho

GPOY

veracrossing:

This is my favorite leap year quote. 

veracrossing:

This is my favorite leap year quote. 

sharonosbourne:

yzma:

sharonosbourne:

urbanfuck:

sharonosbourne:

I want to kiss the person that created ramen noodles

image

momofuku ando — the creator of ramen

I want to kiss Momofuku Ando

he’s been dead for six years

EVERY TIME I FALL IN LOVE SOMETHING LIKE THIS HAPPENS

(Source: andrewbelami)