Now That’s What I Call Tumblr

(Source: sydney-rakestraw)

gingerblivet:

straddling-the-atmosphere:

onceuponabopper:

thetimetravelersguidetothegalaxy:

wittywallflower:

Writing is weird.

One minute you are telling a story.

The next minute you are researching the average amount of snowfall Edinburgh gets.

or how to kill someone with a piece of barbed wire and a tomato

Or how much force it takes to dent a human skull with a can of Pepsi.

what the hell are you guys writing?

Porn.

burnt-kloverfield:

ramblings-of-a-crazy-man:

fefeferi:

a moment of silence for the confused tumblr users

no really what does it mean

Absolutely nothing.  It was all a fabulous ruse set up to confuse those out of the loop

pearlsandlockets:

tumblr: a 2012 summary

(Source: tepeii)

superwhoavengelockandme:

convixial:

hickish:

anekatips:

i couldn’t resist i bought a giant spoon ok someone save me from my compulsive buying


you aren’t alone

OMG please get married.

superwhoavengelockandme:

convixial:

hickish:

anekatips:

i couldn’t resist i bought a giant spoon ok 
someone save me from my compulsive buying

image

you aren’t alone

OMG please get married.

image

tinyphilosophy:

crowleyaziraphale:

edgebug:

turnabout-taisa:

my-singing-soul:

why is it that all the most popular posts on tumblr

are written like this

with no capitals

and no punctuation

i just really want there to be a popular and grammatically correct post on tumblr

I think the majority of Tumblr’s dialect (is there a word for a written dialect? Hardly anyone speaks Tumblr.) comes from influence within the tag system.

My theory is that the lack of capitalization is stylized, ironic laziness (same reason as the increasingly popular use of abbreviations such as idek and ikr, and particles like desu), whereas the punctuation stems from the tag system, where commas split up tags. So, “this is like, so totally cool” would be tagged “this is like” “so totally cool.”

With commas struck from the tumblr blogger’s arsenal, they rely on run-on sentences and other means to show emphasis. One such means, spacing, is another quirk influenced by the tags. If you repeat a tag, it will only show once, which is why you get “really r e a l l y weird things like this.”

Also common on Tumblr are people who show their enthusiasm through their text by pretending their haNDS ARE FRKEAKIGN OUT AN D THEY CANT TPYE OMFGGGG. This adaptation is actually pretty cool, I think, as it serves to communicate tone across a very toneless medium.

Did you hear that noise? That was the sound of my desk breaking. My linguistics boner just snapped it in half.

 

moonblossom:

tomatomouthkisser:

toni-tan:

vladith:

enganld-ebooks:

aleclightw0od:

thenewkiki:

micarteraesnarnia:

This is someone dying while having an MRI scan. Before you die, your brain releases tons and tons of endorphins that make you feel a range of emotions. Tragically beautiful.

LMAO, this is from season 1 of The Walking Dead. You can see the AMC logo up at the top right corner, oh my god. People will believe anything.

but this is an ice cream wtf 

no its becky

Say hello to mechanically separated chicken. It’s what all fast-food chicken is made from—things like chicken nuggets and patties. Also, the processed frozen chicken in the stores is made from it.Basically, the entire chicken is smashed and pressed through a sieve—bones, eyes, guts, and all. it comes out looking like this.There’s more: because it’s crawling with bacteria, it will be washed with ammonia, soaked in it, actually. Then, because it tastes gross, it will be reflavored artificially. Then, because it is weirdly pink, it will be dyed with artificial color.But, hey, at least it tastes good, right?

no, this is patrick

i will never understand this post

No, but I could give you the directions to a real Italian restaurant

moonblossom:

tomatomouthkisser:

toni-tan:

vladith:

enganld-ebooks:

aleclightw0od:

thenewkiki:

micarteraesnarnia:

This is someone dying while having an MRI scan. Before you die, your brain releases tons and tons of endorphins that make you feel a range of emotions. Tragically beautiful.

LMAO, this is from season 1 of The Walking Dead. You can see the AMC logo up at the top right corner, oh my god. People will believe anything.

but this is an ice cream wtf 

no its becky

Say hello to mechanically separated chicken. It’s what all fast-food chicken is made from—things like chicken nuggets and patties. Also, the processed frozen chicken in the stores is made from it.

Basically, the entire chicken is smashed and pressed through a sieve—bones, eyes, guts, and all. it comes out looking like this.

There’s more: because it’s crawling with bacteria, it will be washed with ammonia, soaked in it, actually. Then, because it tastes gross, it will be reflavored artificially. Then, because it is weirdly pink, it will be dyed with artificial color.

But, hey, at least it tastes good, right?

no, this is patrick

i will never understand this post

No, but I could give you the directions to a real Italian restaurant

(Source: disappointful)

Played 452,109 times

islekstlef:

But aren’t all waffles round?: If the Doctor Who characters joined Tumblr

dalekhugger:

flapperorslapper:

  • Nine: Tags everything as “fantastic”, advises his followers to stay awake by eating bananas (good source of potassium), has Jackie Tyler blocked, recs Charles Dickens most weeks, loves geeky academic memes and calls anons in his ask box “stupid apes”
  • Captain Jack: Cannot resist clicking his mouse on every person’s username, uses his Time Agency technology to basically invent the idea of dirty tags
  • Ten: Adds looooong, rambling comments to every single post, signs off nightly saying “I don’t want to go”, starts off every ask box reply with “Wellllll”, tells everyone that they’re “brilliant”, frequently reblogs blond women, rotates between a navy and brown background, has a ginger as his icon, keeps “little shops” as a tracked tag and is rather involved with the Harry Potter fandom
  • Martha: Fabulous David Tennant fangirl with brilliant posts; also follows medical blogs
  • Donna: Oi, she’s just on to like every post of Captain Jack’s.
  • The Master: Runs FuckYeahTeletubbies, follows every Doctor blog and secretly gets excited when they post a video, hacks into the Tumblr datacenter to change every user’s icon to his face
  • River: On only to hush blogs that openly share TV/movie/book spoilers without warning
  • Eleven: Constantly searches for unusual meal recipes, follows every hipster blog he can find and even runs one about hats, thinks reblogs “are cool”, is baffled by Tumblr vocabulary and doesn’t use it correctly, has Marilyn Monroe as his background, frequently takes a break from typing to eat biscuits
  • Amy: Has the power to type in a Scottish accent
  • Rory: Is so devoted to the site that whenever there’s an error, he’ll wait forever by his computer until it’s back up
  • The Weeping Angels: are the Tumbeasts, and they have the datacenter.
  • Rose also was going to join Tumblr, but then she got high.

(Source: formerlyflapperorslapper)

frankyfitz:

pauls-nipples:

sgtpeppersays:

ze-gotinha:

Tumblr dashboard evolution

 aww our baby grew up so fast

that second one looks evil.

“aww our baby grew up so fast”

(Source: ulayy)

2000milesawayfromher:

everything——amazing:

And here we have a classic example of a Tumblr Supernatural fan vs. a Non-Tumblr Supernatural fan

(Source: thepiratessaviour)

debatchery:

because Samandriel is basically tumblr

debatchery:

because Samandriel is basically tumblr

Played 1,141,699 times

omgtsn:

YOU KNOW I DON’T THINK THIS IS HOW THE SONG GOES

(Source: omgtsn)

I realized if you hover over an avatar, it tells you the main title thing of a blog.

agentbartowski:

thelifeandtimesoftheliving:

Then this happened.

hey that’s me